Written by: Matt Shock (@shockwave_music)
Edited by: Curt Ashcraft (@cashcraft740)
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Okay, if we’re being completely honest, the golfing world didn’t really lose a legend as much as it lost its crazy uncle who always wore his Budweiser hat to church. Such was the charm that surrounded Curt and I’s favorite golf course, Hidden Holes. The holes were apparently hidden too well, as the course went out of business and has since been returned to farmland.
Way back during the beginnings of ‘Our Sports Report’, I decided to name the holes of our beloved course, much like the way the holes are named at Saint Andrews over in Scotland. You can find that post here.
Sadly, the very things that we loved about this golf course also likely led to its downfall.
With tight fairways, greens the size of your standard smartphone screen, and dual tee boxes for each hole (allowing you to play 18 holes), Hidden Holes provided even the most experienced golfer with a pleasant challenge. (And by experienced golfer, I mean “normal” people who play golf often, as no PGA pro would ever be caught dead there…not even Tiger, who’s appetite for hillbilly fun will forever live in infamy in the IHOP Waitress Hall of Shame…but I digress.) However, most of the experienced golfers I know preferred to play elsewhere.
To say the least, the place offered some unique…we’ll call them “challenges”…that always made things interesting.
For the cost of a Hot-N-Ready pizza and a six pack of PBR, one could golf nine holes (cart included)…so this place wasn’t exactly as exclusive as say Augusta National. Hidden Holes was indeed a place where people from all walks of life could go when they thought, “It’s a nice day. What the hell…let’s go play golf.” Frequently, this open door policy was accompanied by golf cart races, games of chicken, and attempts at imitating the game of polo (which I may or may not have engaged in a time or two). Apparently, experienced golfers (people who don’t appreciate the finer things in life like the Demolition Derby, Rough Truck Competition, or the Figure 8 School Bus Race) look down their noses at such activities. Frankly, I think that’s a real shame, because a golf cart race or two would do those people some good.
If you’re having trouble picturing the type of environment I’m describing, watch the beginning of the pool scene from Caddyshack, and you’ll see what I mean.
Now, on the other hand, the small greens and tight fairways that I talked about earlier gradually began to discourage the casual golfers from coming out as well. I mean, I’ll be very honest, this course made me want to quit golf on a couple of occasions (mostly while playing the second hole).
The course in and of itself, was a double-edged sword. The normal people scared away the serious golfers who really like a challenge, and the challenge scared away the normal people to the point where nobody really showed up anymore. This of course creates a mighty difficult situation since golf courses aren’t exactly the cheapest things to run.
For all of us here at ‘Our Sports Report’, I would personally like to honor the memory of Hidden Holes. We had a great run. Thanks for the memories!